Fun with Google.

So I forgot about something.  Yesterday I was bored and playing with my Sprint Samsung Rant phone that has the slide out keyboard and all-internet access (if you can bear to look at the internet on a tiny little screen).  I've actually been using it to check my email on a regular basis (when I get out of the shower, when I'm brushing my teeth, when I'm sitting in traffic, when I'm pumping gas, when I'm painting my toenails) and I learned that I can use AIM, gChat, Yahoo! IM, and MSNMessenger (or whatever it's called), too!  ANYWAY, I was playing around with mini mobile Google and I put in "PVille guy."

AND, this is the most exciting part of it all, "...And I Stole Your Hat, Too" came up!  It was the first time that this had happened to me in my *blogging* life!  So then I thought, what else can I google and get "AISYH2"?

FCOG:  Immediately I realized that I was not as important as I had originally thought.  FCOG is an acronym for the First Church of God.  Which I will always remember now whenever I use that term.  I don't think they would be too pleased with my version.

WHIRLING DERVISH: This brought up some interesting things.  I always thought "whirling dervish" was a Victorian name for a cyclone, twister, or windstorm.  TURNS OUT, a whirling dervish is a dancing Sufi monk (or what we know as monks in the western world) and the whirling dance is actually considered a way to reach religious ecstasy.  See that? You learn something new everyday!

JOHN'S MOM:  UrbanDictionary.com cites that the phrase "John's Mom" refers to a "a woman infatuated by 'dark meat' " or a variation of "yo mama."  As in "This sucks." "Like John's mom." I would just like to say I'm sorry for that.

CHILDISH BEHAVIOR:  This just found a lot of psychological sites.  And a nice little article about the differences between childish and child-like.  I was too A.D.D. to read it but you can:

http://www.boloji.com/family/00149.htm 

("Why Can't An Adult Be Like A Child?" by Ramendra Kumar. 2000)

BOOTY CALL: (yes, I know that this will be interesting)  Oh, dear Lord!  For Chrissakes! If this isn't a surefire sign of the death of romance and chivalry, I don't know what else is!

 http://www.onlinebootycall.com/

I could keep going with this all day!

Babymamadrama.

So I maybe forgot to mention that I talked to John's mom on Saturday.  Well, see it happened in quite a sane way so don't go thinking that I called her to "tell on him" as he is now convinced.  While on my way to return the phone, I called her to see if she or his brother were going to be home.  She didn't call back before I got there.  You know this part of the story.  

On my way home, she called me back and talked to me.  About work.  About Photoshop (she is a graphic designer and I am learning how to use it for work).  About Pville Guy.  I love John's mom.  She is a great lady, devout and strong in her convictions and faith.  I've also known her longer than I've known John (through his sister).  She asked why John was so upset and grumpy lately.  I said I didn't know.  She asked about the FCOG.  This woman wants to know about the girl his son is dating.  I didn't want to answer, but she asked if she was nice.

Hmmm... so what do I say?  A better person would have said, "She's a great girl."

But seeing that this whole blog was created with the idea that I'm certainly not the better person, I said something that I probably shouldn't have.  "No, she really isn't."  Ok, I was angry.  I had voicemails and texts from this girl telling me to stay away from John.  I didn't really think about it.  I also told her about the voicemail from the night before.  I did not mention the one kicker that would send his Devout Catholic mother over the edge.  She has a baby.  

So you can imagine my surprise today when I received a text accusing me of this from John.

"Stop texting me," I said after denying the claim.  I'm just too tired to fight anymore.