Add another to the list of losers... or not.

So PVille guy... WTF?  Oh my lawd, oh my lawd. W. T. F.  Last night we were doing our courtship dance via texts as usual.  (By the way, remind me to tell the story of how I met this one). Anyway, he asked the usual "Why do you like me?" and I said the usual "Because you're smart, nice, and cute."  And then I thought to myself, what the hell is his problem?  Why can't he jump on board the commitment train?  I am awesome and he sucks if he can't see that.  Girl power to me 21 hours ago.  So I texted back with "Why DON'T u like me?"  And the madder I got, the more I wanted to know.  "If you have something that you want, why don't you do something about it?"

So I waited for his response.  And waited.  And all the while I'm thinking, It's amazing that these life-changing important relationship milestones are being discussed via text messages.  Are real estate acquisitions and business transactions done this way now, too?  

Then it came.  The reason.  What I had been waiting to here for weeks from this guy.

"B4 u, there was someone else.  I'm still not over her.  I'm sorry 4 everything."

SO... you can imagine my response.

Sorry, it's just too easy nowadays.  So this then set off a rapid-fire of "inspired" texts to him ranging from the "I feel like a complete idiot" to the "I can't believe all the shit that I did for you" to the even more wicked "You aren't sorry, you are pathetic."

I'm not going to let someone walk all over me.  I'm a modern-day woman and I am strong.

Or so I thought until this morning.  I woke up and realized that this poor guy (and trust me, I'm still mad but hear me out) is really going through some shit right now.  To still be in love with some whore (or dare I say New FCOG- but she's an ex so it would be XFCOG and that's gonna be confusing) after a year... who wants nothing to do with him... and it's affecting a relationship with someone who he likes and could potentially have a decent thing going with... that's just really gotta suck.

So I did the only thing I know how to do when it comes to modern day romance communications.  I sent him a message on Facebook.  I can only imagine how life for Josephine and Napolean would have been if the 'Book existed back then.  I pretty much told him I was mad but that it's time for him to get over it and get out there and meet new people if he ever wanted to have something serious and meaningful again- it probably wouldn't be with me because I'm still simmering- but all the same, you have to live your own life.  This chick is not worth the internal strife if she can't see the good things I see (but seriously, I'm not a pushover).

I know, I'm so nice.  

So, I'm officially single.  And that's ok because I put together an agenda of what I'll be doing this weekend:

1. Go to movie theater and throw stuff at emo kids waiting in line to see "Twilight."

2. Read Revolutionary Road before Kate and Leo do it on the big screen.

3. Go on a road trip through Amish country (it's like 15 min from here) and take pictures like a tourist.  The cheese factory is off.the.hizzook.

4. Finally get around to throwing away the dead palmetto bug that my cat killed and I've been too grossed out/fascinated to pick it up and throw it away.  It currently resides on my living room floor, legs up.

5. Maybe go to the gym?  But probably not.

6. Make cupcakes. (Followed by the inevitable "Why the hell did I do this? WHO the HELL is going to eat all these cupcakes?)

7. Trace my hand and make the traditional turkey picture.

8. Make several copies of turkey and hang up around my kitchen.

9. Throw away the moldy jack-o-latern I carved for Halloween.  I was trying to make a statement art piece with it as it molded... but it smells.

And finally number 10:

Go to ModCloth.com and buy a dress that looks like Joan Halloway's on "Mad Men," get dolled up, and then walk around asking people for a light at one of our townie bars while I look for someone who looks like either Jon Hamm or John Slattery to take home (or Dr. Rapist, but really, I'd prefer one of the Johns).

I'll do one of these or most of these or all of these or none of these.  Either way, there will be pictures on Monday.  TTFN.