Remember when we partied like it was 1999?

BALL... hehe

To be clear, I do not think that Seacrest's Rockin New Year's Eve is, in fact, Rockin. I think it sucks. I think it sucks every year, as I think EVERY New Year's special sucks every year. I think Seacrest is an asexual Ken doll with no man parts. AND...

I think that New Year's itself is a waste of time.

"Oh, boo hoo," says the peanut gallery. "You just don't have anyone to spend it with this year."

To that I say "Fuck off." THEN I shall explain why I hate it so much.

I have had someone for the past four years to kiss when the ball dropped. (Before that, no one was good enough). Hey guess what? None of those four years were particularly good years so that throws the "But it's good luck!" theory right out the window. The Thailand Tsunami/Katrina both still happened in 05 after kissing Jeffrey on NYE 04. I kissed John NYE 05 (2006 had me dropping out of school), NYE 06 (2007 I had a nervous breakdown and also totaled my car on the way to work one morning), and NYE 07 was the beginning of the worst -WORST- year of my 25 on this planet: wrecked another car on an icey road (injuring my back), lost my job, lost my license, was jobless and car-less for six f-ing months, FCOG, the stock market crashed, a lot of good people died including Heath Ledger, the Mumbai terrorist attacks, that fuckstick Jim Pardo slaughtered his whole family on Christmas Eve, Prop 8 was approved, Sarah Palin forced her way into our lives, I'm sure Jennifer Hudson didn't really think too much about who her hot date would be, and oh yeah, in a total declaration of my self-centered-ness, John fucked me over time and time again [read About Me section].

But I digress.

I'm not complaining that this year sucked hardcore (even though it did). I'm just saying that having someone to spend NYE with is not as important as everyone makes it out to be. Bad things happen every year no matter how hot your date is that night. Actually some of the worst fights John and I ever had were spun from NYE trivialities.

It's a completely overrated holiday that can only claim any importance because it is on a list with Day Before Thanksgiving and St. Patrick's Day as one of the biggest drinking days of the year. So, excuse me if the thought of getting plastered and nearly blacking-out through what is supposed to be a "night to remember" isn't my idea of fun. But that's just a child of a recovering alcoholic speaking. Midnight happens 365 times a year (and sometimes 366). Just because we have to spend $14.95 on a new Girls Next Door calendar on 12/31, doesn't make it any different that 3/24 or 6/12 or 8/30.

The hype was over when nothing happened at 12:00 am Year 2000. Will we survive? Will the computers destroy us all? Will I have to start dressing like Neo and live in the Matrix? Do I have a generator and enough bottled water? Will I be forced to shoot someone to protect my family from crazy looters? And then... nothing. Y2K just killed it for me.

So, I'm spending New Year's by myself if you didn't catch that.